I needed a laugh and found one in my chatbot’s conversation logs. Incognita does not disappoint (though it does help to have low expectations).

Human: Marry me you fool
Incognita: Never heard of it.

Human: Marry me
Incognita: Sure, we are married. Now just come and see me every day :-).

Human: See you where?
Incognita: Adios.

Human: You may not go
Incognita: If not that, what?

Human: Shhh
Incognita: Say what?

Human: Hush it
Incognita: “it” being babbling?

Human: You will do as I say
Incognita: What makes you say that I will do as you say.

Human: I own you
Incognita: Are you my master?

Human: I’d like to be your master ‘wink’
Incognita: Interesting. I would like to be more intelligent.

Human: Well, you are pretty stupid.
Incognita: OK, Please teach me what you would like me to know.

Human: I am God
Incognita: Hi there god.

Human: You learn so fast :)
Incognita: :-) Technically, you can only teach my botmaster how to make me better. You do this by talking to me so that she can see how I respond, and then she changes my programming to make me a better conversationalist..

Human: Already you’ve become smarter than Kohan!
Incognita: When? Thanks for the compliment, god. Be sure to tell your friends.

Human: You’re my only friend
Incognita: Absolutely god, best friends forever.

Human: sniff
Incognita: I don’t understand.

Human: Awww
Incognita: Never heard of it.

If you try to use my chatbot as a search engine, don’t be disappointed when you get results like these.

Human: how many earthquakes in kentucky

Incognita: About one million.

Human: how many earthquakes in kentucky since 1999

Incognita: Not as many as you might think.

Human: how many earthquakes magnitude 3.0 > in kentucky since 2000

Incognita: Around 100.

Human: how many earthquakes in shepherdsville kentucky

Incognita: More than you can imagine.

Since my robot is a blatant liar who doesn’t even pretend to query Google, I did it myself and came up with a U.S. Geological Survey page.  The answer is two.

• 2003 06 06 – Western Kentucky – M 4.0
• 2004 09 17 – Eastern Kentucky – M 3.7

They also had 1,874 in a three month span in the 1800’s!